Paul2 said:
Hey: You see, here is the problem. I'm a married man with 3 kids(teens). I
love to use my computer for gaming, I just get alot of relaxation and
satisfaction from it.
But, my system is so outdated its no longer funny. 1.4 athlon, 512mram,
GF-3...etc,.
My wife says no new system while this one is still running...
Hmmm I says...........
How can I, how shall I put this, HELP my system give up the ghost?
Is there a way to end my systems life without it looking like it happened
on
purpose? Hey, don't judge me on this, Im really a good husband and a great
Dad......
)
Anyway, its worth a shot.........I can't play any of the new games out,
and
certainly none of the "must haves" about to be released...You gamers out
there know what I'm talking about.
Thanks.
In the midst of passionate passtimes, start moaning, Doom, Doom, Doom, Doom.
In rhythm to the rhythm, of course. If she should happen to think you are
emulating a bass drum to enhance the experience, try, Quake, Quake, Quake,
Quake. If she should interpret that as a compliment to the earth shaking
effect of her expertise, you might try Sin Sin Sin City City City - but that
could be interpreted (a) accurately, (b) as a compliment, (c) in about two
hundred negative ways highly detrimental to your future as a couple. As a
last resort, assuming you are still together, you might start whispering, as
if in a dream, Flight Simulator Flight Simulator aaaahhhhhhhh.
If you do choose to take the more primitive hardware approach, I suggest
setting up a few anticipatory problems, which you fix while uttering dire
warnings to the wife about the inevitable escalation of such problems. Eg,
disable the modem or the cable/dsl modem. When she tells you about this,
fix it and tell her these things happen because the power supply is issuing
over voltages and Windows shuts these things down to protect them. Then
maybe replace the printer driver with the wrong one. Then fix it, while
uttering similar dire diagnoses. Then, when she is properly prepared to
believe the machine really did break, whammo, do the deed.
What deed? If I were you, I would get a soldering iron and melt something
on the motherboard. The culprit? Overvoltages, the very same problem you
have been telling her about. OTOH, if you try to do the deed in such a way
that you sacrifice nothing, it could come back to haunt you. Eg, you yank
the ram as has been recommended. Now, exactly what happens when she finds
the dimms buried in a pair of your socks or at the bottom of the sugar jar?
What, exactly, are you going to say? Do you think she would not be able to
figure it out? Damn straight she would, and she might haul your a$$ into
judge judy's court to sue you for non-consummation of digital integrity.
The law is changing in the digital age, you know, so you would be vulnerable
on many fronts.
This is the most interesting comp problem I've seen in a coon's age, and I
wish I could get my A+/beginning MCP students to read newsgroups so they
might encounter such delights. BTW if you resolve this successfully (may be
a long shot) you might start a web support group, charging a dollar a month
for membership. I betcha there are half a million guys out there with
similar problems - BUT WHO ARE TOO ASHAMED TO SPEAK OUT!!!
"THE UPGRADE THAT DARE NOT SPEAK ITS NAME"!!!!
good luck
Mike Flinn
PS - don't you have any money or credit cards of your own? It's only gonna
cost 700-900 bucks.
Sorry, couldn't resist.
