TV Licencing ... an open letter

muckshifter

muckshifter

I'm not weird, I'm a limited edition.
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To,
Michelle Tunstall
TV Licensencing Enforcment Manager

From;
The Present Occupier
Flat 6
**************
**********
************

The reason you have not heard from me is ... Your Customer Services does not exist ... I cannot contact you. :rolleyes:

I welcome your visit to my Hovel ... though you will not get a cup of tea off me, at least you'll "see" ...
I HAVE NO TV


Sincerly ****ed off,
The Present Occupier,
Flat 6,
bla bla bla

PS. stop sending me RED letters.
 
We used to get those ALL the time to our old uni halls when I didn't have a TV. I think they send them to everyone address that doesn't have a License, as 95% of people have TV's now.

We rang 0870 241 6468 and just told them we don't have TV's in our room, only the communal one for the halls of residence. If you don't have a TV, just ignore them - not as if they can do anything if you aren't doing anything wrong :D
 
I have rung that number on many occasions only to find "all our operators are busy at the moment buuurrrrrr" and get cut off.

I am sick and tired of being threatened with £1,000 fine ... it seems I am not the only one.

http://www.marmalade.net/lime/#people
 

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Nice one Mucks, it reminds me of the letter that one guy sent to his bank explaining the charges he was going to impose on the bank for answering their calls, responding to their letters etc.

I think the bank one was a joke, but I know exactly where you are coming from. If I can find a copy I will post if up for a smile!:)

Keep up the good relations mate;)
 
Dear Ms Micheille Tunstall ...

There are some tenets of English Law you may not be familiar with ... perhaps I should clarify them for you.

Firstly, there is a concept of a "reasonable man" ... by which is commonly assumed a man/woman of average intelligence. Any reasonable man, I maintain, would accept that I have been given every opportunity to buy your product and that I could not reasonably claim not to understand the possible ramifications of not buying your product. I think only the Mafia could have made their sales pitch clearer. (Strangely, you don't point out the benefits of buying your product).

Secondly, there is the concept of innocent until proven guilty. The first two lines of text on your latest missive state "You could be fined up to £1,000" and "We have no record of a valid licence for this address". The whole tone of the letter is then accusatory. There is an implication in the letter that I am breaking the law ... whilst this in itself is not defamatory, since I undoubtedly am breaking the law (English Laws being so esoteric that, technically, walking along the path is obstruction and being in public anywhere can be behaviour likely to cause a breach of the peace) it is rather disconcerting to be so vehemently accused of a crime in particular, rather than one in general.

Thirdly, there is the concept of reasonable behaviour. I accept it is reasonable of you to notify me in writing of my duties and obligations; I even accept that it is acceptable of you to follow this up with a personal visit to hand deliver a letter and ensure I am "compos mentis". What is not acceptable is that you should constantly badger me with inane nonsense and make repeated visits to my premises. You state quite clearly that you have the technology, that you can verify any use of unlicensed TV reception equipment ... presumably, the evidence presented by an electronic scanner is even admissible in court (which makes me wonder why you don't build in date, time and GPS locators and don't even bother knocking on doors ... expense? ... being nice? ... it was just a thought ... now that would be a cool gizmo to play with wouldn't it ... vrooooooom).

But to get to the point. Let us agree there is no TV licence for this address to simplify matters, and let us further agree that I have no plans to purchase such within the foreseeable future. Additionally, we shall both agree that you have both the technology and the will to discover unlicensed use of TV equipment. Given these statements, I see no further need for any communication between yourself and myself on this topic ...our positions are clear ... no licence here, and if you catch me (or presumably anyone else on the premises ... namely Flat 6 ... I take full responsibility) using TV reception equipment here you'll belt me with a £1000 facilitation fee.


Now ... to other matters. I phoned the number on the back of your letter ... at about 1.15pm, today 12th Jan 2006. I listened to the automated attendant ... press x if you want an over 74 licence, y if you want to renew ..... - and I pressed 3 for "other enquiries" - whereupon I was put through to another automated attendant telling me to "press x if you want an over 74 licence....." - erm - no - I've already answered that question. And then, to add insult to injury, after choosing again - I get "sorry we're are busy" - couldn't you have told me that at the beginning?

And now - to the contract. In light of the fact that correspondence with yourselves is now costing me money ... directly, in terms of telephone calls and internet access to post this to you, and indirectly in terms of time, I feel obliged to inform you that any further correspondence between you and me will be chargeable at the rates set out below.

Form letters not addressed to the named resident of the house and/or addressed to a named non-resident Opening £30 (acctually, am I allowed to open letter not with my name on it?)
Replying £45 (please indicate clearly if you wish to receive a reply - I wouldn't want any misunderstandings)
Individual reply letters (ie non-form letters) ... however addressed ... no charge
E-mail form letters ... no charge for the first 5 received ... £20 each thereafter

Answering door to authorised representative of TV Licensing
Pre-midday £75
12-6pm £25
6pm-Midnight £45
Being sober when TV Licensing representative is due to call ... POA

I trust these terms and conditions meet with your approval. Any further correspondence (other than non-chargeable correspondence) will be deemed to be an acceptance of these conditions. A full copy of my ST&C is available on request.

Sincerely,

The Present Occupier

Flat 6
 
You will show us any reply won't you!:D

Can I let you know next time I have a nasty letter to write, please ....;)
 
CITech said:
You will show us any reply won't you!:D

Can I let you know next time I have a nasty letter to write, please ....;)
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Oh no ... I don't do 'nasty' letters. ;)


Case Ref: TVLE*******

Thank you for your e-mail. This will receive attention as soon as possible. If you need to contact us regarding this matter please include this e-mail's reference number in the body of your reply e-mail.

Thank you

**********************************************************************************
This email and any files transmitted with it are confidential, and may be subject to legal privilege, and are intended solely for the use of the individual or entity to whom they are addressed.
If you have received this email in error or think you may have done so, you may not peruse, use, disseminate, distribute or copy this message. Please notify the sender immediately and delete the original e-mail from your system.

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***********************************************************************************
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Hmmm, notice the bit I put in bold ... still, it is an email and anybody could have read it on the way here.

;)
 
Haha, I had exactly the same thing Mucks :)

I had only been moved in about a week and a bloke called around at about 7pm and asked me if I had a TV Licence. I said 'If I had you wouldn't be here would you?'

He then asked if he could look around to see if I had a TV and showed me his ID. I thought ok and he looked in the living room, saw no telly, and was on his way out but I insisted on showing him every room including the karzi. He thanked me and promised I wouldn't be troubled again.

Six months later, following a constant stream of letters and phone calls from the buggers, another geezer called round so I gave him the guided tour as well.

I kept getting letters, accusatory like Mucks said, and I kept getting phone calls. I got into a long argument with one guy who phoned up and he eventually lost his rag with me and hung up :D Can't remember exact flow of conversation but I took the lines I was going to sue them for harrassment and asked him if he had a TV Licence and what his name was.

And it carried on, more letters, but no phone calls.

Six months later, another fella turned up at around 9pm and asked if he could look to see if I had a TV.

I said 'Have you got a search warrant?' He replied no. 'Then **** ***' was my response. And he did.

Haven't heard from them now in over a year :)
 
It would not be so bad if I could acctually talk to someone ... I'm getting into the habit of pressing "record now" on my answer phone ... just itching for someone to phone me from that place ... :)

Floppy, there must be something wrong with their computer. Bet you get a letter by the end of the week. :D
 
Could understand them wanting the fee quickly if there was anything decent on.. If it wasn`t for the wife and kids i would`nt bother either.
 
Rush said:
Could understand them wanting the fee quickly if there was anything decent on.. If it wasn`t for the wife and kids i would`nt bother either.
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I agree with you load of crap on the box!!!!!!!!!!
 
I remember when i was young my dad screaming..
Turn the goggle box off and get some fresh air !!
 
I remember having the same problem with the "broadcasting fee" over here a few years back. Eventually they cancelled the fee, I suspect that the cost of chasing them up ended up more than the profit they were making, but the amount of "Ill will" they were creating made it a very nice little election issue.

I do recall that issues of people in situations like us, where we have a TV but it is used only to watch DVD's & videos since we cannot actually recieve broadcast TV, were discussed (The entirety of Fiordland, for example, cannot recieve broadcast TV due to all those lumpy mountain bits lying around everywhere), as was the incidence of people who used their TV only to watch sky TV, a private service for which they were already paying a supplier for & which is independent of the New Zealand broadcasting company "New Zealand on Air". For some reason they also objected to paying NZ on air for a service they did not use. It became very controversial & since NZ on air could not prove that a television was, or was not being used to access their service... so we haven't had TV licence charges for over 5 years now.
 
Then you be the lucky ones....we get ripped off every year and for what, umpteen repeats of the same programmes we have already paid to watch first time round....:mad:
 
I SO AGREE!!!

I BELEIVE THAT THE BBC ARE MONEY MAKING SCUM!

they got all that money, really makes me sick!

Everyone paying their hard earned cash for a licence, but what do the BBC have to justify it? Nothing! Their programmes are quickly turning to mush, I see no real output for us.

I think this Licence law should be abolished! It really makes me angry!
 
Actually, I'm quite proud of the BBC, think of what it does.

All those nature programs and quality drama, several good radio stations, a HUGE website covering thousands of subjects and a largely unbiased worldwide news service.

Now I stopped watching TV several years ago so I don't know about repeats, but when I stopped watching there were still new programs appearing.

And all that without any advertising at all. To avoid adverts the BBC depends on a licence fee and worldwide sales of it's products and all those products' offshoots, like books.

I am opposed to the licence fee but I do feel for around £2.00 a week you get quite a good deal.

If the licence fee was scrapped, we would have advertising on BBC TV and Radio. The UK is almost unique in having a Broadcast service that is advertising free.
 
BBC are very good. Very very good indeed. Don't knock 'em, they cater for most peoples taste in programmes and i think they do a damn good job.
 
christopherpostill said:
BBC are very good. Very very good indeed. Don't knock 'em, they cater for most peoples taste in programmes and i think they do a damn good job.
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they put on top gear so i'm happy
 
Lets get one thing straight if all it takes to save £120 a year is to flick our remotes so as not to watch adverts then invite me aboard.

BBC is a rip off , I mean their sport is fantastic... they have Darts..Rugby (now and again)...eeerrrrm and eeeerrm

:)
 
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