The Dog

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A man sees a sign outside a house - 'Talking Dog For Sale.' He rings the bell, the owner appears and tells him the dog can be viewed in the back garden.
The man sees a very nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there.

"Do you really talk?" he asks the dog.
"Yes," the Labrador replies.

After recovering from the shock of hearing the dog talk, he man asks, "So, tell me your story."
The Labrador looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the SAS.

"In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one imagined that a dog would be eavesdropping.
"I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years.

But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at Heathrow to do some undercover security work, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded several medals. I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired."

The man is amazed. He goes back into the house and asks the owner how much he wants for the dog.
"Ten quid," the owner says.
"£10!!? But this dog is absolutely amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"
"Because he's a lying bastard. He's never been out of the garden!!.
 
I have two rescued dogs and if they could talk and Taz would say something like that, Max is blind only about 2 years old collie but he wouldn’t he is as one would say is what you see is what you get and very loving, but Taz is a bit sly but still very loving.
 
My sisters dog, now deaf rules the house, knows how to get her own way and often gets the best chair to sit on. Sis treats her like a baby I treat her like a dog and those spaniel big eyes dont soften me, oh ok a bit!!!
 
Ahh yes feckit I get the treatment around walk time (strange how dogs know the time) if I am sitting down or in my little computer room when they gang up on me Taz looking at me with his eyes and Max doing the same with his blind eyes how can you resist them. They are reliant on you, they are not like cats where they take themselves out to take them out come rain and shine, and how can you resist them. They get used to a routine rather like small children and they get used to a routine.
 
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