H
Helen
This is a take-off on the classic comedy skit by Abbot and
Costello called
"Who's On First." If you're under 30 you might not get it.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Bud and Lou in the 21st Century
ABBOT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm
thinking about
buying a computer.
ABBOT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou
ABBOT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou
ABBOT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the
windows?
ABBOT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and
software.
ABBOT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to
write
proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you
got?
ABBOT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOT: Yes
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK,
let's just say,
I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What
do I need?
ABBOT: WORD.
COSTELLO: what word?
ABBOT: WORD in Office.
COSTELLO: the only word in office is office.
ABBOT: the WORD in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: which word in office for windows?
ABBOT: the WORD you get when you click the blue W
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't start
with some
straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the
Internet?
ABBOT: yes, you want Real One.
COSTELLO: maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is
none of your
business. Just tell me what I need!
ABBOT: Real One.
COSTELLO: if it's a long movie I also want to see reel 2,3&4.
Can I watch
them?
ABBOT: of course.
COSTELLO: great, with what?
ABBOT: Real One.
COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie.
What do I do?
ABBOT: you click the blue 1
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOT: the blue 1.
COSTELLO: is that different from the blue w?
ABBOT: the blue 1 is Realone and the blue W is word.
COSTELLO: what word?
ABBOT: the WORD in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: but there's three words in office for windows!
ABBOT: no, just one. but it's the most popular word in the
world
COSTELLO: it is?
ABBOT: yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other words
left. It pretty
much wiped out all the other words out there.
COSTELLO: and that word is real one?
ABBOT: Real One has nothing to do with WORD. Real one isn't
even part of
Office.
COSTELLO: stop! Don't start that again. What about financial
bookkeeping,
you have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOT: MONEY.
COSTELLO: that's right. What do you have?
ABBOT: MONEY
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOT: it comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: what's bundled to my computer?
ABBOT: MONEY
COSTELLO: money comes with my computer?
ABBOT: yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?>
ABBOT: one copy
COSTELLO: isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy MONEY.
COSTELLO: they can give you a license to copy money?
ABBOT: why not, they own it.
Costello called
"Who's On First." If you're under 30 you might not get it.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Bud and Lou in the 21st Century
ABBOT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm
thinking about
buying a computer.
ABBOT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou
ABBOT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou
ABBOT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look in the
windows?
ABBOT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and
software.
ABBOT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to
write
proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you
got?
ABBOT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOT: Yes
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office and it has windows! OK,
let's just say,
I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What
do I need?
ABBOT: WORD.
COSTELLO: what word?
ABBOT: WORD in Office.
COSTELLO: the only word in office is office.
ABBOT: the WORD in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: which word in office for windows?
ABBOT: the WORD you get when you click the blue W
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue w if you don't start
with some
straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the
Internet?
ABBOT: yes, you want Real One.
COSTELLO: maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is
none of your
business. Just tell me what I need!
ABBOT: Real One.
COSTELLO: if it's a long movie I also want to see reel 2,3&4.
Can I watch
them?
ABBOT: of course.
COSTELLO: great, with what?
ABBOT: Real One.
COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie.
What do I do?
ABBOT: you click the blue 1
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOT: the blue 1.
COSTELLO: is that different from the blue w?
ABBOT: the blue 1 is Realone and the blue W is word.
COSTELLO: what word?
ABBOT: the WORD in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: but there's three words in office for windows!
ABBOT: no, just one. but it's the most popular word in the
world
COSTELLO: it is?
ABBOT: yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other words
left. It pretty
much wiped out all the other words out there.
COSTELLO: and that word is real one?
ABBOT: Real One has nothing to do with WORD. Real one isn't
even part of
Office.
COSTELLO: stop! Don't start that again. What about financial
bookkeeping,
you have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOT: MONEY.
COSTELLO: that's right. What do you have?
ABBOT: MONEY
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOT: it comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: what's bundled to my computer?
ABBOT: MONEY
COSTELLO: money comes with my computer?
ABBOT: yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?>
ABBOT: one copy
COSTELLO: isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy MONEY.
COSTELLO: they can give you a license to copy money?
ABBOT: why not, they own it.