Ay Up

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Ay up, errrm, i havnt got a clue what i am doing here really, i have a few probs with my computer.

1. i have installed ewido which got quarantined killerfiles trojan for me, but the shield keeps switching itself off.

2. every now and again my computer shuts itself down and re boots, then i get a message saying it has recovered from a serious error and i send my report in to microsoft.

could someone please help direct me to the correct topic section to find any of these problems may have already been posted and answered.

thank you.
 
oooooooo and if anyone can help me, could u please bear in mind that i have no pc knowledge at all, all i know is how to type, so pleeeease be patient with me, and u may need to answer me as if i am ten years old, i promise i shant say u are being patronising.
 
oh, I can be VERY patronising ... ;-)

huh oh!!! ... I was thinking of sending you to PCWorld for a Healthcare check-up, but then I remembered this post.

https://www.pcreview.co.uk/forums/thread-4289.php

... so in that light, pass me a nice new shiny £20 note and we'll do the job for you. :D

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Oh, welcome to the Forums ... err, I think. ;)
 
Well thank u for yr replies, but...........i have borrowed this computer while i am waiting for a new ( new secondhand one) to be delivered off ebay. and when this computer arrived at my house, it had no anti virus, no spyware scanners, no firewall, no nothing. So i downloaded spybot and adaware, but when i tried to run them the computer kept re booting, so............i got scared and uninstalled them, then i got brave again and downloaded ewido, and ran it in safe mode, and it got loads of spyware including the killerfiles trojan, ooooooooooooooooooo i was pleased with me little old self, cus i am just a little old wrinklie grannie wo knows nowt about owt except typing. so......anyway, i have decided...........i shall leave this computer as it is for now, and when my NEW computer arrives would u be willing to advise me on what i need to download first as regards firewall, anti virus etc please.

:D :D :D ooooooooooo i am scared, i dont wanna get virus's on my new puter.
 
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oh, I can be VERY patronising ... ;-)
huh oh!!! ... I was thinking of sending you to PCWorld for a Healthcare check-up, but then I remembered this post.

https://www.pcreview.co.uk/forums/thread-4289.php

... so in that light, pass me a nice new shiny £20 note and we'll do the job for you. :D

nod.gif



Oh, welcome to the Forums ... err, I think. ;)
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eerrm thanks, but................why would u send me to pc world for a healthcare check up, there is nowt wrong with ME, nooooo tis my puter thats broken not ME.
 
AMAZED said:
eerrm thanks, but................why would u send me to pc world for a healthcare check up, there is nowt wrong with ME, nooooo tis my puter thats broken not ME.
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Oh, you'll fit in just fine around here ...
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:thumb:
 
Hi AMAZED :wave:

& don't worry, we really are just as nutty as we appear :nod:
 
cooooeeeeeeeeeeee cirianz, great aviator, i need to download some i havnt got any. i said a little joke in the jokey bit but i dont think anybody got it, so........i shant tell any more jokes till at LEAST one person laffs at that one. i am sulkin now, errm i think wot i am tryin to say is..........would one of u lot go and find my joke and laff at it, hysterically, like as if it REALLY is funny. pleeeeeeeease.
 
Hi there Amazed
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nice to meet you ... oh, and I'm chuckling at your sheep joke too:D
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floppybootstomp said:
Hey look, I'm laughing >>> :lol:

Hur hur hur :D

Ay oop lass and welcome :)

lol @ Flops

Don't worry AMAZED, he really is a smarta*se, just watch where you boot him... you might give him a concussion ;)

With the number of jokes there are about what Kiwi's do with sheep I got it, however, in general it's best to avoid jokes that are politically oriented so you probably won't get too many responses.

Aviator? I'm probably being completely stupid but that one went right over my head? Unless you're refering to the fact that we flew before the Wright brothers? :confused:
 
cirianz said:
Aviator? I'm probably being completely stupid but that one went right over my head? Unless you're refering to the fact that we flew before the Wright brothers? :confused:

Just guessing, but I think Amazed was admiring your Avatar Ciri .... am I right Amazed?:D
 
Taffycat said:
Just guessing, but I think Amazed was admiring your Avatar Ciri .... am I right Amazed?:D

ROTFL, Thank you Taffy :D I said I was probably being stupid but missing that was not my brightest moment :lol:

Thank you AMAZED, my daughter does a lot of pixel art, although she whipped that one up in about an hour for me so it's a bit of a quickie job. One day she'll finish updating her website & you'll be able to see some examples of her work that are less than 3 years old :rolleyes:
 
Aviator

:lol: :lol: :lol: YES i meant avator, and.......... i thought i would download some, and i went in google and typed in msn display pics and i clicked on a link and got loads of good ones, but then................ a box popped up with a microsoft thing icon on it, saying i had been in an adult site and it would be tracked and could affect my marriage and even my credit status, and did i want them to remove the traces of it,.......i clicked no and came out. am i in trubble ?
 
Ahhhhh, you probably hit Gates's personal p*rn site
& he'll now hound you to the ends of his petty-cash jar :nod:
 
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